A. and I have known each other since we were 5 years old; we grew up in the same town.
As we got older those remained the only real things we had in common.
I think we both realized we each felt more comfortable with other friends but we kept up the appearance of being best friends for many decades.
We developed different interests and our personalities could not have been more different.
He loved music, cars, speed boats, and always had the newest electronic gadgets. He grew up in a wealthy family.
I enjoyed exercise, sports and writing. I grew up in a lower middle class family.
He's complex, intense; type A.
I'm simpler, more laid back; type B.
His glass is often half empty; mine is usually half full.
He's always looking for a get rich quick scheme; I'm a slow and steady sort of investor.
He went into sales and commission work.
I became a doctor.
We've never really understood each other in terms of life choices or our career paths; even what makes us tick or what causes us stress.
Nonetheless, we remained "friends;" not a whole lot different from an unhappily married couple who stays together for the kids.
We even honored a pack we had made as teenagers to be each others best man when we married.
A few years ago he came to Florida for a vacation with his family.
I came up with an excuse as to why I couldn't meet up with him.
I guess I decided it was time for a change.
I wouldn't expect my kids to spend time with a person they really had nothing in common with and they along with my wife often asked why I continued to foster a pseudo-friendship with A..
A. was pissed. He sent me a letter letting me know how he couldn't believe I didn't take the time to see him. Included something along the lines of "after all the things I did for you as a friend over the years..."
I never really answered him...just continued to send him Birthday and Christmas cards every year.
Well, he just let me know he will be back down next week for another vacation with his family and wants to get together for a drink.
I'm going to see him this time.
I suspect he will want to have a discussion as to why we have grown apart.
I suspect he knows the answer; I was just the first one to say "Uncle."
I'm going to let him know I'll always remember, cherish and appreciate the times we had together as young kids. I still laugh when I think about some of the things we shared as kids.
I'll let him know I still consider us to be lifelong friends; just friends who just haven't had anything in common for many decades.
He has no idea I write this blog or that I use it as a way to get my thoughts together...mission accomplished.